You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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