The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
