ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
