Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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