there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
