I smell stomach acid.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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