I looked at my own cervix.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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