Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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