wrigley field is MILF paradise
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
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