the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize