You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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