I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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