now i know why i became what i already was.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
organizing the empties. That sober.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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