honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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