He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
