ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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