Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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