his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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