hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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