Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
