with your own penis?
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize