He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
