We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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