I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
