from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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