Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
