i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
