no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
