Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Randomize
