they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
