I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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