Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
