I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
