I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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