community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
