so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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