god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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