walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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