I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
