This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
They are going to name an STD after you.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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