Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
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