Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
