we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My pussy is not your playground.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize