He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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