i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
