You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
