walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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