That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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