he puts the penis in happiness.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize