Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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