He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
